Listen
Fr. Simon Herbers, CP
"God gave us two ears and only one mouth. So he probably wants us to spend twice as much time listening as we do speaking." This quote from an unknown author does not address the reason for all people and animals having two ears. However, it says something about listening. As our hearing begins to fail we learn what a precious gift it is to listen to music, the sounds of nature, and especially the human voice.
In a Wisconsin hospital, music therapist Deanne Edwards went into the room of an elderly man. "I went in there to sing a song for him," she said, "and he said, ‘Your song was fine but I’d rather talk.’ I listened to him and later I wrote this song. It’s called ‘Who Will Listen?"
It’s been a long, long time since I’ve said what’s on my mind.
Doesn’t anybody have the time to spare?
I have memories I wish I could share.
Is there someone who will listen to an old man,
Though they’ve heard the words a hundred times before?
All the stories I have told, like me, are growing old…
Doesn’t anybody listen anymore?
Shortly before his death, writer Louis Cassels outlined what he called a "ministry of listening." When a person confides in you, he usually doesn’t want advice. He wants somebody to understand and care about his troubles. "When you can’t do anything, as when a person is grieving over the death of a loved one, listening requires a willingness to suffer silently with the grieving friend, accepting not only the reality, but also the insolubility of his problems." "It is essential," says Mr. Cassels, "to suppress the urge to voice moral judgments."
"My father and I had words this morning," said a small child, "but I didn’t get to use mine." James White, author of "Talking With a Child," says that many children have little chance for actual conversation with adults. People talk to them, not with them. "If you love to listen, you will gain knowledge and if you incline your ear you will become wise." Sirack 6:33.
Dr. Abraham Schmitt, author of "The Art of Listening With Love," says that such listening can transform people and relationships.
The art of listening is a gift you can give, no matter who you are. And you can give it to anyone. It doesn’t cost a cent. Yet, to be a person who needs a listener, it’s a gift beyond price. Each of us can start today, wherever we find ourselves, to learn to listen.
